Hike Your Own Hashtag

We see you on Instagram and Twitter, with your hip hiking hashtags and plagiarized photos. Your accounts exist only for the fulfillment of followers, attempting to capitalize on current hobbies and passions of which you’re too lazy to pursue yourself.

This is clickbait in the rawest form, an attention whore’s publicity stunt, turning trends the way hookers turn tricks. Anything to grab the attention of your audience. You might even include a sales pitch under the summit of a mountain, complete with a commercialized comical phrase!

I’d Hike That!

No, you wouldn’t. You’re too busy researching what all the cool kids are coining to adorn your next overpriced coffee mug, complemented by a silhouette of the Cascades! Don’t forget to appeal to the Christians, with the hiking quote in the form of a cross. We wouldn’t want them knowing you’re an atheist, would we? A bit contradictory to the rest of your collection, though, isn’t it? Fear not, for they can be directed straight to the link in your bio to complete their purchase, being none the wiser!

While you’re at it, you might want to share the shot of the model at an elevation where the climb of her encumbered anorexic anatomy would surely shatter her frail shawl-draped body, to be carried off with even a whisper of the wind.

Not all is lost on your cash grabbing social media shenanigans, as these pictures belonging to everyone but you could entice future hikers and backpackers to hit the trail. For that, we’re thankful.

…but we still think you’re a clown.

3 thoughts on “Hike Your Own Hashtag

    1. Thanks! Could be a bit cynical and dramatic, which was intended, but I’m noticing more and more advertisement accounts being created for the sole purpose of utilizing the hard work and dedication of others to sell their own piggybacking products.

      Once they have enough followers by sharing the content that doesn’t belong to them, they’ll start sprinkling in photos for whatever it is they’re trying to make a profit on.

      Liked by 1 person

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